So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
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