please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
There was a lot of him and a little penis
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize
