It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
