Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
soo... how was my night?
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize
