I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
