I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I'm at about main and main street
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
