mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
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