Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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