its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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