Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
