Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
