I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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