If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Randomize
