Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Randomize
