she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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