As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
