i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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