Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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