Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize
