I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
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