dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize