This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Randomize
