Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
