I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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