K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
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she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
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She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.