btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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