And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
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it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
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Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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