Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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