im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
