I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
