I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
