I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
We are two peas in an std pod
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Randomize
