I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Randomize
