I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
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