Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Randomize
