I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
