Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Randomize
