And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
