I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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