it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
