dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Randomize
