i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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