at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
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