yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Randomize
