I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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