Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Randomize
