Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
