yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
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I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
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Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
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