Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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