I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize
